Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection

Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection by Charles Duhigg

Communicating and connecting with people is the key to build strong relationships. Those that can communicate well tend to get along better. Some people are born with natural skills, but others can learn. Some simple things to do are showing interest and relating. Responding to nonverbal cues in nonverbal manners is key. When two people exhibit the same type of laughter, they better relate to each other. (Though if they show different types of laughter it may cause a rift.) Showing vulnerability and struggles that one had previously are also valuable.

The book includes examples from various fields. In the initial pitch for "Big Bang Theory", some geniuses had no social skills. However, people couldn't relate. Adding somebody social that exposed her feeling allowed the others a foil and helped the performance. A CIA operative tried to recruit a spy. She turned him down out of feer. However, after dropping the recruit pitch and letting her walk, he shared his concerns about his career. She relaxed and decided to join. For dealing with anti-vaxers, doctors could present facts to no avail. However, relating to concerns about life and family did bring about some desire for vaccines. 

In general, people need to show concern for others concerns and let them make choices on their own. Nonverbal communication can be as helpful as verbal.